Lord, help me remain calm

Today started ok, our daughter woke around 10 am, while my wife and son were at the store. She ate breakfast, took a shower and had to be reminded to start her school work. I told her that she needed to complete all 4 core subjects and she questioned why. I told her that 4 subjects were required. She sat at the laptop for over an hour, then got up and said she was done. When my wife checked the the school work online she had spent less than an hour total for all 4 subjects. My wife asked me to call the facility in Georgia and ask how much time she was required to do each day while there. I called the education department and was told that the IXL curriculum that was used there, was just supplemental to what she be doing as her main school work. She also advised me that our daughter was required to do approximately 45-60 minutes in each subject while there.
After lunch, she went next door to play with the neighbors. The afternoon seemed to go ok and we left around 5 pm for church. We ate dinner at church, went to our classes and then headed home. We arrived home around 8 pm and my wife told the kids she wanted everyone in bed my 9:30 pm. My son was in bed by 9 pm, as usual and my wife headed a few minutes later. At 9:15 pm while I was in the living room, my daughter stormed down to my bedroom where my wife was in bed and began to start an argument. She always chooses to start a fight about something that won't even occur for a day or two. She screamed for a few minutes and then slammed my bedroom door so hard that I am surprised it isn't broken. She stormed back to the kitchen screaming. I told her that since she wanted to start fighting and slam my door, she needed to go to bed right now. She said, "mom said 9:30 and it isn't 9:30 yet. Since she refused to go to her room and turn off her lamp, and had not turned her lamp off and gone to bed on time, even one time since arriving home Saturday, I proceeded to remove the lightbulb from her lamp (probably not the wisest move, but I had had enough). Since my wife had told her 9:30 previously, I put the bulb back in the lamp. It is now 9:55 pm, she is in her room with the door shut and the yes, the lamp is still on. She refuses to follow rules of any kind.
I really regret losing my temper tonight. I did good yesterday maintaining my cool and even did pretty good today. But, when she went to my room and began screaming at my wife who was exhausted and resting quietly, I lost it. I hate that I made it so close to the end of the day and then lost my temper.
Lord, I am a fallible man, help me to remain calm. There are things that cause me to lose my cool, especially when I feel that my wife is being hurt. Lord, let the Holy Spirit wash over me in times of chaos. Help our family to all stay calm and learn to communicate without shouting. Lord, I recognize my areas of weakness, please help me. In Jesus name, Amen.